


The Great Escape

by Anns_Revenge



Category: Uta no Prince-sama
Genre: Alternate Universe - High School, Drama, Love Triangles, Multi, Romance
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2016-01-07
Updated: 2016-01-07
Packaged: 2018-08-18 18:12:18
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 11
Words: 20,799
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/8171054
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Anns_Revenge/pseuds/Anns_Revenge
Summary: AU. His kisses tasted like sweat, tears, beer, and just a hint of cinnamon. Tokiya didn't mind that though. In fact, he could get used to it.





	1. Paper bags and plastic hearts

**Author's Note:**

> I had originally planned to have this story in a fandom that would leave lots reviews (POJ is a good one) but I love you guys more.
> 
> Warnings- Major OOC. Some characters backgrounds changed (it is and AU after all) and lot and lot of homosexuality

_The Great Escape_

_Paper bags and Plastic hearts_

_Oct. 9_

Otoya sighed taking a sip from the glass bottle. He hated riding in the backseat of his cousin's car, it meant no radio control. So not only was a crappy pop song on, but it was blaring loud enough to give him a headache. Something that only the dizzying pleasure of the booze in his hand couldn't easily cure.

"Otoya." His younger half brother glance back from the driver's seat. His stunning green eyes showed nothing but concern for the red head.

"Keep your eyes on the road Cecil." Otoya flicked his wrist, sloshing his beer almost to the point of spilling, at his family member.

One of Otoya's friends, the same one who had stolen the front seat from him, agreed cheerfully with his slightly tipsy friend. "Yeah, see that's why you need practice. So no more complaining about driving us around."

The other to males in the backseat snickered at the comment. "You'll never get your temps driving like this. Keep driving."

Cecil blushed, tightening his grip on the steering wheel, forcing his eyes off of the a very bored looking Otoya. "F-fine."

"Hey take the next left." One of the males in the back leaned forward throwing his arm around the seat, almost hitting the driver in e process. "You can drop us off at my house."

He did as instructed. His tanned hands rested lightly on the wheel as he pulled up a somewhat familiar driveway. The rowdy friends of Otoya hopped out giggling and swaying haphazardly.

"Otoya-nii." Cecil turned watching his older brother flop over. He moved to shake him but Otoya's harsh voice stopped him.

"We don't live in Japan anymore, so stop adding 'nii' to my name."

"I waited until your friends left this time, just like I promised."

"It doesn't matter."

Cecil turned back and lowered the volume of the music. "Can we finally go home? I've been driving for hours."

"Yeah." Otoya sat up. "Do you need me to drive?"

"No!" The brown haired teen shouted, mostly by accident. He hated when his brother was drunk. Even though Otoya already had his license and he did not, he would still rather take them home.

"Fine." Otoya sighed flopping back down.

"By the way have you talked to Syo latey? He said we are going to have a new neighbor."

"Like I want to talk to him. That would mean talking to his brother. I'd rather keep our interactions to mostly school stuff."

"Otoya-nii." Cecil said in a hushed, sad voice.

"Shut up and drive."

* * *

 

_Oct. 10_

Otoya winced as his eyes opened to the sun filled room. His room darkening curtains pried wide open to reveal the dreaded beams that licked at his face. The red head groaned and sat up all while wondering how exactly he had managed to make it into his room. Usually after a night of drinking he barely managed to pass out on the couch.

"Otoya-nii." His fourteen year old brother knocked on his door lightly. "Father wishes to speak with you."

The sleepy one grumbled. "No thanks."

"But Otoya-nii."

"I have things to do today."

He could hear Cecil sighing beyond the door in defeat. "Mother is waiting too."

Otoya tsked at that. He detested Kotomi with a passion. Not only had she been the reason that he had been forced to move away from Japan. Forced away from his real father.

Otoya, who had been at the tender age of four, didn't understand at the time what had happened. He thought his father would be over joyed to have another son, or at that time maybe even a daughter. But he wasn't. As the red head grew up he began to understand, even without his father ever saying anything during their visitations. With the realization of what his mother had done, he too, started to resent her.

"Tell them I'm gong to Hikaru's house. I need to return his car after all." He called through his unmoving door (much to his surprise that the dark haired teen hadn't barged in), hoping he could use his cousin as a scapegoat.

"But-"

"Then I'll be spending the night at Haruka's place."

"And tomorrow?"

"If they still want to talk, they will have to wait until I finish visiting Syo. I might even stay over just to get away from their overbearing attitude." He pulled out his last resort. He would rather not go over the Kurusu mansion, but if he had to he would.

"We have school on Monday."

Otoya exhaled loudly, frustrated, and annoyed. He was tired of talking to his infuriating little brother. The dense teen couldn't tell when to leave him alone. He had just woken up, the last thing he wanted to deal with was his parents, or the throbbing headache that emerged every time Cecil uttered a word. Though that could be his hangover. His hand grasped his forehead in desperation to alleviate the pain. "Don't you have something better to do that pester me? Go play with Kuro or something." He snapped.

Cecil did not flinch. He was used to it. Instead he went off to notify his parents of his elder brother's plans and to find his black cat, Kuro. "Yes Otoya-nii."

Otoya let loose a relieved sigh as his half brother's footfalls grew faint. He tore off his sweat filled clothes from the day before only to put on a similar white shirt and black skin tight jeans, surprisingly not throwing his old articles on the floor but in the laundry basket. He didn't try to tame his unruly hair, rather he just fingered through it trying to make it look somewhat presentable.

The next thing was far harder to accomplish . Stealthily, almost ninja like, he descended the staircase. When he thought the coast was clear he stepped into the kitchen. He knew that Cecil, being a goody-two-shoes he was, had put the car keys on the hook (where they rightfully belonged) just inside the kitchen. And because of that he was spotted with his hand no further than an inch from their target.

"Otoya." His mother called out to him. She watched him flinch under her gaze. "Since you're going out, could you please take the trash out?"

The teen frowned at her kind and nonchalant behavior. She was always so understanding towards him, that it made him sick. Whenever he rebelled she let him be, as if she knew he needed space. She let him get away with things that most other mothers would frown upon. Like the first time he had come home drunk, she sat with him until the moment he had her leave. Kotomi really was a wonderful and living mother, Otoya just refused to see it.

"Fine." He grumbled, somewhat grateful. After all, she could have forced him to start, grounding him or punishing him for his obvious disrespect for her and her husband. But no, she let him go. With a flick of his wrist he swiped the keys from the brassy hook. He then sulked over to their garbage can. As he tried to hastily take the bag from the can, Otoya ended up spilling some of the empty boxes to the floor.

Kotomi smiled and suppressed a giggle at the hardship that her son had created for himself. He often did this and got mad with nobody to blame but him. She bent down and tenderly picked up a box and handed it to him. "You should be more gentle."

Huffing, the red head snatched the emptied cardboard away from her hand and mumbled angerly. "It's fine."

"Otoya." She called after he tied the bag and started to the door. When he didn't answer she continued. "I'll make curry for dinner tomorrow. Please try to come home for it, okay?"

Otoya grunted. "Whatever."

* * *

 

Tomochika Shibuya was normally a very friendly and cheerful person. But when it came to people bursting into hers and Haruka's shared apartment, while she had her girlfriend pinned down on the couch shirt all but unbuttoned and opened, she became rather rude. This was something Otoya knew quite well.

This was probably the third time that week he had barged in unannounced. And probably the seventh time that month, which had just started ten days prior, that he had interrupted them n such a matter.

"Don't you have anywhere else to go?" Tomo shrieked at him, her clumsy hands trying to close the buttons of her Haruka's blouse as fast as she could.

He looked over at them with bored eyes. "Nah, Syo is busy with his weird training. If I were there he would make me join him. No thanks."

"What about your other friends?" Haruka asked practically pushing Tomo aside as she sat up.

He rolled his red eyes at her. "They are only drinking friends. We don't talk or anything aside from that."

The petit redhead sighed. "I'll go put on something a little more appropriate. Would you like a drink while I'm up?"

"No thanks."

Tomo waited until her girlfriend disappeared behind the corner, leading to their shared room, before speaking. "You should think of making better friends. Ones that you can go to so I don't get blocked. Of I didn't want to get some I would still be living with my parents."

"Thanks for that lovely description." He plopped down in a chair across from the couch. "Besides I have you guys, I don't need other friends."

" Don't count me or Haruka for a second. In fact don't even count Syo. Count only the people that you don't only talk to when it concerns getting away from your family. Count people that you just like to hang out with."

Otoya hummed. "And my drinking friends don't count."

He watched Tomo's red curls bounce as she shook her head.

"Uh." He thought for a moment."You and Haruka."

" We don't count."

"Mmm, then no one really. If you said not to count Syo."

"Really?"

"Why do you not sound surprised?"

"Well it's not very surprising."

"What's not?" Haruka appeared from around the bend in cute little blue shorts and a plain oversized white tee, that probably belonged to Tomo.

Tomochika leaned back with a huge grin. "That poor Ittoki has no real friends."

"Oh, I knew that."

"Haruka!" Otoya hissed.

She gasped. "I thought we were being honest. I'm sorry one moment." She cleared her throat. "What meant was; there's no way that could be true."

"Thanks a lot." He grumbled.

"Well you could always try to make new friends. I've heard there's a transfer student is coming on Monday."

"Cecil said something about that."

"It could be a chance-" The petit red head started but was interrupted but Shibuya, when she turned to her and said. "Nanami how did you find out?"

"The student council president was talking about it while I was filing the papers. By the way the drama team is getting more funding, your welcome."

The curly redhead wriggled her thin eyebrows. "Being the treasurer has it's perks."

"Well Kurusu and I are friends." She laughed. "It comes with the territory of being Syo's friend. Right Otoya?"

"I'm definitely not friends with Kaoru. He hates me and I hate him."

"Well you are a bad influence for Syo." Tomo spoke honestly.

"You make it sound like I'm some horrible monster that destroys anything that my eyes meet." Otoya learned forward in his chair.

"Well let's just say one night with you would probably land him, or anyone, in the hospital. Not only that but he would lose all of the scholarships he's gotten." She also leaned forwards, getting in his face.

"Now, now. Calm down you two." Haruka smiled.

"Oh please I'm not that bad."

"Sure. With your reputation I wouldn't be surprised if even the new kid didn't like you. You'd probably never make a new friend."

"You wanna make a bet?"

"Come on you two."

"Bring it on." Shibuya smirked.

* * *

 

_Oct. 11_

Otoya yawned loudly, trying his best to cover his face with his hand, as he hopped out of Kaoru's, sleek, fancy, black, sports car. Kaoru, who had not been please to have Otoya over the day before, or to be driving him to school, sighed in frustration while taking the key from the ignition.

"I hate Mondays."

"Who doesn't?" Syo nodded in agreement.

"Let's ditch." Ittoki grinned.

"Syo if you even think about it I'll make sure you have detention for a month. And ban form all of your sports activities for two months." Kaoru's stern look made Syo jump.

"I think I'll pass." The shorter blonde bowed.

"Aw, here I was thinking we could get matching Prince Albert piercings."

"No!" Both brothers yelled simultaneously.

" You guys are so lame."

"That's a bit much." Syo blushed.

"No, you're just insane." Kaoru scoffed.

"Whatever." Ittoki ran his fingers though his hair. "Anyways Syo can I borrow your English homework? I forgot mine."

Syo looked at his brother. "Sorry Otoya. I did mine on Friday and left it in my locker. You'll just have to try to hurry and finish it before the bell."

"Man that sucks. I actually did the stupid assignment."

"I wish I could help."

"Lame!"

"I'm sure lots of people didn't do it."

"But I did do it."

Kaoru sighed knowing he couldn't stop their complaints and uphold the laws that he as the president was supposed to. "Fine, I'm going! I have things to do for the student council that needs my attention. I'll see you after classes Syo."

"Thanks big bro!" Syo brightened as his brother left them behind.

"That dude is such a buzz kill."

"Aw, he's just worried. Papa and Mum are out of town again. So he's in charge. It's gotta be stressful."

Syo Kurusu, although being a year younger than Otoya (and his almost identical older brother), he still managed to keep up with being a grade ahead. Some would say that the Kurusu boys were geniuses. He was friendly with everyone, despite having a short temper, and also the most fashionable person Otoya knew.

"-Think he's like?" Syo finished, snapping the redhead out of his daydream and back into reality.

"What?"

"The new student. All I got from Kaoru was he's a male, and we will be sharing English with him."

"Wait didn't you tell Cecil he was our new neighbor?"

"Yeah."

"How did you know that?"

"I look just like Kaoru when I'm sitting in the student council room. So I have my ways." He hear Otoya laugh before he finished. "I hope he and I can be friends."

"Meh." Otoya shrugged. "I don't really care."


	2. All our belongings in shopping carts.

_The Great Escape_

_All our belongings in shopping carts._

_Oct. 11_

First he combed his hair to perfection. Not a single strand was out of line, each piece was pushed down and pulled back neatly. Then he decided he hated it and messed it up, letting his spiky ends flying up everywhere. He didn't like that either. After about half an hour of fretting and getting yelled at through the door he settled with his normal look. It was something between sloppy and perfection, his spiky ends sticking up.

"Tokiya!" His mother yelled. Her voice stern and and threatening, her foot could be hear heard tapping against the floor from the other side. "If you don't get your ass in gear right now!"

She didn't finish her threat, she didn't have to. He was out of his room and standing in front of her ready to leave seconds after her voice stopped. "I'm sorry." His blue eyes only looked at the floor, refusing to meeting her gaze.

His mother scoffed, her hands resting on her hips, blue eyes string at him. "You have work tonight so make sure you're home on time. No screwing around. I will not except any of you're silly excuses. We moved you to a new school, and were kind enough to let you decide where you wanted to go. If the same thing repeats it's self then we are taking you out of school."

He bowed politely. "Thank you for giving me this second chance. I am terribly sorry for the inconvenience."

"Go. I'm finished with you, drive yourself to school, I don't have time to escort you anymore." She shooed him away with a crude look on her face.

"Yes." He spun on his heels heading for the door. He couldn't help but to look back to see she had already gone back into the kitchen. He sighed heavily making sure the keys to his rundown, old, rusty pick-up truck were still in his pocket, from the night before, as he slipped on his shoes and left.

* * *

Otoya quickly scribbled down his answers from Syo's paper onto his. His red eyes were more focused that Syo had ever seen them before, he found it extremely amusing to watch.

"Wow!" The blonde exclaimed looking down at the paper. "It's rather surprising, but you have really pretty hand writing. It's almost like a girl's. Maybe even better than Haruka's."

"You're lucky that I'm really preoccupied or I'd punch you so hard your head would spin." Otoya didn't even bother to scowl. He just continued to furiously write, although after the comment he tried to make it a little more messy.

"Attention class!" The pink haired teacher walked in while clapping his hands. "As most of you probably know, we have a new student. Why don't you introduce yourself."

Otoya didn't look up as the other person walked in. He barely heard a word of the other's measly introduction, which was probably how awesome his life was and how he wanted to make friends with everyone the normal bull shit. It took a nudge from Syo and and the loud voice of the teacher yelling his name to finally get him to look up.

"Ittoki! Raise your damn hand." The teacher screamed, he had apparently been trying for a few minutes to get his attention.

Some of the other teens snickered. Otoya stood and raised his hand. "Ringo you can't say damn at school.

"Shut up Ittoki." He spat flipping his long curls over his shoulder.

"You can't say that either." More giggles and laughs.

Ringo sighed. "Go ahead Tokiya, you sit behind the loud mouth redhead."

That's when Otoya finally looked at him, the new kid or whatever that his friends had been talking about. He wasn't what Otoya pictured. He was tall and scrawny. His blue hair was messy. And his deep dark eyes seemed to avert themselves from any gazes that tried to meet them. Not the type of kid who would brag about how awesome he was, or how many friends he wanted to make.

"Thank you." He whispered.

* * *

Syo dashed off to his next class like there was a serial killer on his tail. Otoya knew how much Syo loved sports, he knew how much Syo liked Ryuuya. So it didn't surprise him how fast his little blonde friend had run away, but he could still frown about it. And he did. Even though he understood, it still sucked being ditched so fast for a second period gym class.

"Hey Haruka." He said setting his backpack down on his desk next to Haruka's. His red eyes glanced at her notebook before she covered it with her arm. "Another one?"

"Oh, hello Otoya." She said with a blush spreading across her cheeks. "Y-yeah."

He scooped up her notebook, earing a loud gasp from her. "For a lesbian you sure write a lot of yaoi. Another story you posting on that website?"

"Eh?" Her whole face, even her ears, turned a bright shade of red. "That doesn't really matter, does it? And it's not like I only like girls, I can ship whoever I want. And the girls on that site love to hear your guy's sexcupades."

Otoya's nose scrunched up at the beginning of the story, she obviously had just started it, the pairing probably wasn't even set in stone yet. He trew it back at her, making the petite girl scramble to try to catch it. She didn't, it landed sloppily on he desk. "So who are you planning to pair me up with. Please don't tell me it's gunna be Kaoru again. We fucking hate each other."

"Those are always the best pairings though." She giggled.

"Whatever." Ittoki grunted sitting down in his seat. "Have you noticed the increase of Japanese in our community? Are we talking over?"

Haruka rolled her golden eyes. "If you are referring to the new student, yes I noticed."

"Why do you think that is?"

"Does it matter?"

"Come on, tell me."

"Well a lot of businesses are affiliated with one another. Most likely they were transferred her like you're parents." She paused. "And don't even tell me they aren't your parents. You have no idea what it's like growing up without them around."

"Okay, okay." He shrugged. "But you have Tomo, doesn't that make everything alright."

"No, not really. Not until I graduate. Until then we are still playing the she's my guardian thing."

He let out a low whistle. "Must be tough. It'll be fine soon though."

Haruka's eyes grew bright and a grin spread widely across her face from the encouragement. "Yeah!"

* * *

Otoya sat down at a long desk made for three or four people to sit at, in his last and favorite class of the day. Creative writing. He had chosen it as an elective for his last year mostly because he thought it would be easy, and it was. But unfortunately he didn't share it with any of his friends or that he hung out with. He did however share his table with two of Syo's friends. One of them was a tall, always happy, curly haired blonde and the other was a cynical goth with cyan hair and eyes, which were always outlined in black liner. Although he had seen them acting buddy-buddy around Syo they seemed to hate each other and butt heads whenever he wasn't there. The goth, Ai, was also a friend of Cecil, and Otoya had seen him around before, but they had never bothered to say so much as a hello to one another.

As pissed off at each other as they seemed, when it came time to choose their own seats they sat next to each other at the far end of the table away from Otoya, instead of sitting on opposite sides of the room, which made Otoya wonder what was really going on.

"Class listen up!" The brown haired teacher called. "This is Tokiya Ichinose. Some of you may have already met him, but i hope you welcome him. You can take a seat where ever you like."

"Thank you Mr. Kotobuki."

"Call me Reiji. Everyone else does." He smiled.

Otoya watched as the blue haired teen looked around nervously. With a sadistic smirk he waved. "Hey! There's a seat right here."

"Oh Ittoki, actually offering somebody something." Reiji said playfully. "I will mark this on the calendar."

The teen, Tokiya, refused to meet his eyes but he nodded before making his way over to his new seat. With a shy smile he muttered to Otoya. "Thank you."


	3. It's goodbye

_Oct. 14_

Syo stared at his computer screen in disbelief. First thing in the morning and this is not what he wanted to see. In fact he wanted to crawl back into his bed and start the whole day over again, or at the very least, pretend he hasn't seen that message.

Now Syo Kurusu, the youngest member of his family, was a bright and cheerful person. Some people even told him that he shined brighter than the sun. So in his personal dictionary the word 'sad' did not have a definition. In fact that word didn't even exist within his mind, until that moment. So he wasn't sure what to do but grip his heart and stare blankly at the screen as his world slowly began to crumble away.

How should he act when he got to school? It was just a normal day after all. Should he smile like normal, like he always did? How did he smile again? Could he smile again? He had to. After all a Syo that didn't smile wasn't a Syo Kurusu. What was he feeling? It felt like his heart had been torn out. He didn't like it. He had to bite back tears. He didn't cry, he never cried.

_'Let's breakup.'_

Those two words shattered everything. The five years of trust and friendship that they had built. And the three years worth of love that Syo had felt, still felt. He didn't understand. What had he done wrong? Was he not loyal enough? From everything he had read and studied about long distant relationships, he thought he had done everything right. He tried his hardest, and what did he get? A breakup email. Not even a text or a call (knowing that person they probably changed their number already). It hurt. He knew they couldn't meet in person for this sort of thing, but to hear his voice and know he felt hurt too would have helped. But this was so impersonal. It hurt a lot.

"Syo are you almost ready?

He bolted to his feet, pushing his chair half way across the room. He hands formed fists as he shook trying to hold back his tears. "Y-yeah! One sec."

"Hurry up. I'll be waiting in the car." Kaoru yelled.

Syo looked back at the screen and practiced forcing a smile. Hr then shut it off and mumbled to himself. "Damn it Ren, you are the only person who could truly ruin a perfect day for me."

* * *

"What's up Syo?" Otoya finally asked after getting situated and pulling out his unfinished homework. "You've been grumpy since you both picked me up this morning. Did something happen?"

His blue eyes widened. "What? No! I'm totally out upset! What are you even talking about?"

Otoya looked over at his small friends because of the exclamation he made. "Chill. I was just trying to be a good friend."

"Since when do you try to be a good friend. Did something happen to you too?"

"No!" The redhead shouted. "Like anything Tomo said could actually effect me. Besides she was just messing around."

It almost made Syo wonder what the older female had told him but when he opened his mouth he noticed something else dash by behind Otoya. Immediately, without even thinking, he said. "Hello Tokiya."

He flinched. "H-hello."

"Do you mind if I call you Toki or would you prefer Tokiya?"

Ichinose didn't give a real answer, he just nodded his head after Syo had finished talking. So he took it as a yes.

"Leave that nerd alone." Otoya sighed leaning back in his seat, leaving his forgotten homework unfinished in front of him. "It's not like he wants to talk to use anyways."

Syo clicked his tongue. "Don't listen to him Toki, Otoya is just a dick."

"Hey!" Otoya shouted.

Tokiya's blue eyes few to the size of disks. "T-that's not true!"

"See." The redhead said.

Syo almost bashed his head onto his desk. "Toki don't stick up for him after he made fun of you. Otoya don't bully him."

"Or else what?"

"I'll tell Haruka."

"Syo." Kaoru called from the door. "Come to the student councils room at lunch." His brother turned. "Oh Ringo, I'm sorry."

"Is there something you need?"

Syo could hear the smile in Kaoru's voice. "No, thank you though. I'll see you n a few hours."

Ringo walked in clapping his hands. "Alright guys time for class."

_xxx_

Syo sighed shoving his books in his locker. He was so done. He just wanted to go home, find a nice hole to hide in and stay there. When the bell rang he slammed his locker shut and made his way to the student council room.

"What's wrong, Syo?" Tomochika touched his shoulder.

He jumped. "Oh, hello Tomo."

"What's up?"

Syo's blue eyes looked around the mostly empty halls, only a few stragglers that were barely out of their classes remained. "Can I ask you something?"

"Oh course you can." She smiled brightly at him.

"Have you ever had your heart broken?"

"Oh." She fidgeted. "Yes. Why do you ask? Do you need advice?"

"Maybe a little."

"I didn't know you had someone you liked. Do they already have someone they like?"

"No. Or at least they didn't say they did. They just wanted to break it off."

"What?!" Shibuya yelled utterly shocked. Syo cringed. "You already had someone you were going out with?"

"Shh!" He hushed her. "Yes, I had somebody, past tense. But Kaoru can never know."

She nodded. "So what happened?"

" This morning he messaged me. He didn't give me a reason. Nothing. I don't understand what I did wrong. How am I supposed to feel? Everything is just blank and numb."

She could barely resist the urge to hold him and let him cry. But she new he wouldn't. So she tried to shrug indifferently. "That's how heartbreaks are. Over time you'll know what to do. You'll move on and be happy. But it could take time."

"Have you ever experienced it?"

"Of course." Tomo scoffed. "Did you think Nanami was my first love?"

Syo blushed. "I suppose not."

"Anything else?" The redhead stopped in front of the council room.

"Yeah. Uh, um, could I join the drama club?"

"Drama? What about all your sports?"

"I don't have practice on Thursdays and I usually have to wait for Kaoru. It can be really boring. Besides having something other than sports will look good on my college application."

"No problem. I'm sure both Ai and Natsuki will be glad you joined."

"Thanks Tomo, you're the best." He exclaimed with the first real smile he had done all day. Using all of his will power to not give her a big hug.

"Will you be starting today or next week?"

"Can I start today?"

"Yes, that would be great. Maybe then Ichinose won't feel so nervous about coming. Today will be his first day too."

"Okay, I'll see you later." He grinned pushing the door open, almost hitting Haruka, who was no doubt waiting for the drama teacher.

Haruka step out seconds after he entered. "Oh and Syo," Tomo called before the door closed. "you don't have to smile if you don't feel like it.

"Huh?" Nanami turned to her.

"It's nothing." He heard Shibuya mumble as they left.

* * *

Syo ended up waiting his whole lunch for Kaoru to show up only for his older brother to arrive two minutes before the period was over. He used the same excuse he did every time he was late. He was talking to somebody important but he never told Syo who.

"Sorry." Kaoru bowed.

"It's fine. I'm going to hang out at the drama club after school. Come pick me up when you're done okay."

Kaoru hesitated for a moment. "...Sure."

"Is something wrong?"

"No it's just..."

"Just what?" Syo frowned.

"Just, never mind." Kaoru shook his head. "This isn't something I want to talk about now. You might get the wrong idea."

"What?" The younger one pushed with an assertive tone.

"I..."

"What is it, just spit it out already."

"I have a girlfriend. Maybe it's time you start hanging out with girls more. Like outside of the house." His sigh sounded frustrated, his words shaky as if he hadn't collected his thoughts enough to have this conversation. "I mean all you do is sports' training, and spend time skyping that friend of yours from when we lived in China. Find a girl, go out, and have fun. Hang out with just regular friend for all I care. Just not Ittoki."

Syo slouched. "If you want alone time at home with your girlfriend say so."

"Syo that's not what I-"

"I'm gonna stay at Haruka's tonight. Have a fucking blast."

"Come on Syo." His brother reached for his shoulder.

He flinched as he turned to the door. "I have to get to class. See ya."

This day was definitely the worst ever.


	4. But we got one more night.

_Oct. 14_

Now Tomochika Shibuya was a friendly person. She was well loved by both her student and fellow teachers. She liked to, and often did, joke about silly things that would make her drama students, along with her choir students (as those were the classes that she taught), laugh or make them feel as if she were one of them. She would complain about having to wake up early, she would bitch about not having a snow day when it was cold, she would laugh about her love life. She was still young after all. Barely twenty-six.

But above all else she was serious when it came to caring for her students. So when after school came and she faced an almost crying Syo, she was furious. She wanted to march right down to where she knew Kaoru was doing his paperwork and yell at him till she was blue in the face. She also wanted to give Syo a hug and tell him everything would be just fine. But two things stopped her. One, she didn't know if that was the truth. And two she was a teacher, she shouldn't hug any of her students. Bending down to see his reddening eyes she couldn't help but to put a sympathetic hand on his shoulder.

"Oh Syo, what happened?" She didn't need to ask. She already knew.

He bit his lower lip, refusing to meet her eyes. "Nothing."

"Sweetie," Tomochika, tried to make her voice as soothing as possible, gave his shoulder a light squeeze. "You can tell me anything. You know that, right?"

"Ms. Shibuya." One of the drama club members opened the door and peeked her head out.

"We'll be there in a minute." When the girl just stood staring at them, Shibuya snapped at her. "You wait inside."

The drama member yelped nodding her head "yes" before she went in mumbling under her breath.

"Syo?"

" Will you let me stay over tonight if I tell you?"

"Syo you know I can't -"

"Kaoru's being a dick."

Tomochika chewed her lip. "You can hang out with Nanami for a while, but you can't spend the night."

"I don't want to go home."

"Maybe we'll ask Cecil if you can stay over there. Probably Otoya since he would complain if we don't ask him."

"Thank you." Syo said solemnly.

"No problem sweetie." She stood. "Come on, I'm sure Ichinose is feeling very uncomfortable in there."

"Y-yeah."

* * *

"You what?" Haruka looked up from her paperwork.

"I just tried to talk to Syo, but he got really upset at me and said he wanted to go over to your place. I don't know what to do anymore. He's a shut in most of the time. Can you try talking to him for me, or at least calm him down?"

"Sure. But maybe you should talk to Tomo or have her talk to him."

"Why?"

"Well I think she knows. Something she said before lunch has been bothering me."

He eyed her. "What?"

"She told him that he didn't have to smile."

"Didn't she say anything else? I wonder what's bothering him so much she would say that."

"He's your brother shouldn't you know?" Haruka said somewhat bitterly. "You and Otoya always complaining about how awesome it is to have a family."

He felt bad and chose to ignore the last part. "I don't know everything."

"Obviously. You couldn't even talk he was having a bad day before you made it worse."

"And you can?"

"Not me, I don't have any classes with him. Otoya noticed something. He just barely mentioned it before going back to grumbling about Cecil. But he still noticed."

"Are you saying he's a better brother than me?"

"No."

Kaoru hummed. "I guess I'll have to talk o him later when he calms down. I'll talk to Tomo later. Until then..." He gathered his things. "My girlfriend wants to meet up today."

"Have fun on your date." She said also gathering the rest of her paperwork among her other thngs, getting ready to go to the drama club.

* * *

Tomo greeted Haruka as she walked in. The first thing that the short haired redhead noticed was that both Syo and the new kid, Tokiya, looked rather uncomfortable, surrounded by the people of the drama club. Haruka's golden eyes looked into Tomo's.

"Is everything okay?"

"Yes, you don't mind if hangs out for a while, do you?"

"I don't mind." She set her stuff down on the edge of the stage that they were supposed to be using for practice. "Did you ask Cecil or Otoya if he could spend the night there?"

"Oh so Kaoru knows that he doesn't plan on coming home."

"Maybe, I was only half paying attention." Nanami nodded, mostly to herself. "I'll call Otoya. You should pry those kids away from at least Tokiya, he looks like he's going to pass out."

"Okay." Tomo laughed.

* * *

It was a quick but still awkward night at the Aijima/ Ittoki household. Otoya was rebelling, trying to ignore his parents pleas to talk to him, so Syo ended up spending most of his time with Cecil. He sat in the brown haired teens room, listen to him complain about Natsuki, while doing homework.

"It sounds like you love him." Syo said.

"What?" Cecil fumed. "No way! How could I ever fall for someone like him? The person I love is strong, stronger than anyone I know. They are amazing and their eyes are like the sky. The glow so bright when that person smiles, and are as deep as the sea when they are thinking. That person isn't afraid of what anybody thinks of them. They are the best, my perfect person in the world."

"No way! You love Ai?" Syo gasped loudly, hiding a frown behind is hands and an array of giggles. "You totally described him to a T."

"Huh?"

"You don't have to hide it. Ai really is the best, strongest, and mist fearless person we know. Well aside from Otoya." He gave a laugh. "And his eyes are amazing too. I can't blame you for falling for him."

"Wait." Cecil frowned. "I didn't mea-"

"I won't tell him." The blonde forced a smile, blue eyes sliding passed his friend to the clock. "I'm going to sleep. We have school tomorrow."

Cecil sighed in defeat. "Yeah, okay."

"Hey Cecil." Syo said coving himself with the younger boy's blanket. Cecil had refused to let him sleep on the floor, and the guest room was far to messy for him to use. He felt the other crawl in next to him.

"Hmm?" Cecil responded turning to the blonde after shutting the light off. The only thing that allowed him to see the bright blue eyes in front of him was the soft glow of the moon and stars just outside his white curtain-covered window.

"Let's all hang out on Halloween."

"All?"

"You, me, Natsuki, Otoya, Kaoru, and Ai. Just like old times."

Cecil was shocked. Not only did Syo want to hang out, but with everyone. Most of the time he liked to stay home or train. But what really stuck out was... "Old times? You mean when Otoya wasn't as mean and Ai, Kaoru, and Natsuki were his friends? It's not the same now, we've all kinda grown more, and apart." He could see the hurt expression on Syo's fave before he covered is quivering lips with the blanket. "Sure"

"Good."

Cecil smiled he moved closer to Syo, wrapping his arms around the older teen, who seemed to move into the warm embrace that the brown haired boy provided. "Just one more night then everything will change."

Syo laughed, think he knew what was going to happen. But of course he was wrong. He had no clue what was ahead.

* * *

_Oct 15_

Syo fully understood why Otoya had his brother pick him up every morning. With Mr. Aijima working an early shift and their cousins car unavailable for Otoya to use, it was a long walk to school. And his finally understood why Cecil never asked for a ride. Ai, who lived only a few doors down, would often let him hitch a ride on the back of his motorcycle. Which only furthered Syo's ideas of Cecil's crush on Ai.

Syo almost called Natsuki, but Otoya stopped him. For a good reason too. Natsuki lived a few minutes away from the school. It would be rude to make him go fifteen minutes out of the way to puck them up. And since he had to walk he had to wake up earlier.

So to say that Syo was exhausted, after his second period gym class, was probably the understatement of the year. That was probably when he realized how spoiled he was.

"Syo." He flinched at the harsh tone of of his older brother's voice. "Can we talk?"

"I should get to class."

"I'll pardon you and give you a note for your teacher. It's my free period so let's talk in the student council room."

"Can't it just wait?"

"It really can't." Kaoru whispered.

"I don't have time for this." Syo slammed his locker shut.

"I'm sorry!" Kaoru yelled bowing before his brother. A few students looked over that them. "I'm very sorry that I-"

"You're right." Syo touched his shoulder lightly. "Let's move to the student council room."

After getting to the secluded room Kaoru apologized for a better part of twenty minutes to him. He had talked to Tomo, although she refused to give him details, Kaoru learned his brother was and having him be so mean and forceful with his words only hurt his feelings more.

"So you'll forgive me?"

"Mmm." Syo closed his eyes tilting his head to the side while thinking. "I guess. On one condition."

"What?"

"I Kida told Otoya since I hung out with Cecil last night I would go with him to watch a movie of his choice today after school. You don't mind right?"

Kaoru froze. Between gritted teeth he muttered. "Okay." After all he wanted Syo to be happy. Even of he hated Otoya.


	5. Let's get drunk

_Oct. 15_

"No." Otoya looked at Syo. The blonde sat on his bed, waiting for Otoya pick out what he planned to wear, after school. "If you want to go anywhere with me that outfit is a no go."

"Huh?" He looked down at his outfit. It wasn't anything fancy, just plain jeans and a gray pullover hoodie. "What's wrong with it? I thought I could dress casual."

"Casual is what you normally wear. This is... just no. Syo you're a trend setter. You can't go out wearing that. I don't want it to be the next 'in' thing."

"Like you care about trends."

"It's embarrassing."

"Oh? Do you have anything I could wear?"

Otoya turned around looking almost offended. "Do I look that small to you?"

"I'm not small." Syo shouted at him.

"Whatever." He scoffed. "Go ask Cecil if he still has those pants I gave him for a press last year. They should fit you."

"Will he know what I'm talking about?"

Otoya laughed. "Oh yeah. Those are kinda hard to not remember."

"Fine." Syo grumbled.

Otoya sifted through his closet looking for something, anything, for the blonde to wear. His fingers caught on a blue shirt. He stiffened. It would fit Syo, but it was a farewell gift from his father. He had never once worn it. A blue tee with dark flames that looked as if they were crawling up from the bottom.

"Otoya, I'm not sure mismatched pre-ripped jeans are my thing." He held up the black and blue pants for his friend to see.

"They are for tonight." Ittoki threw the shirt at him. "Get dressed. I'm gonna ask if I can borrow the car."

"Sure." Syo forced a smile.

* * *

Otoya was complaining, then again when was he not. About the movie, about not getting the car, having to walk, his mother, his brother, and just really about life in general. Syo would have tried to shush him, but the movie had long ended, they were just walking around, and he had no reason other than the fact he just didn't care or feel like listening.

"They just don't understand."

The blonde tried, he really did as best he could, to hold his tongue but couldn't. "Did you ever explain it to them?"

"Did you ever talk to your brother? Do you plan to?" Otoya didn't wait for an answer. He didn't need to, he already knew it. "No, then shut up."

"Sorry." Syo sighed. "Bitch away."

"Thank you." The redhead rolled his eyes. "Besides, even it I were to explain, how would I word it? Sorry mom I hate you cause I miss my dad. I'm sure that would go down great."

"You don't really hate her."

"Not really, but she's annoying."

"But don't you plan to go back to see your dad?"

"Yeah, right after school let's out I plan to move there. I really have no reason to stay here."

Syo flinched. That hurt. Otoya's friends were important. Or maybe he just didn't see Syo as an important friend worth staying for.

"I was think of going to see him over winter break. I'm sure he misses me. Lately we haven't had the chance to Skype." Ittoki said.

"So...?" The blonde couldn't finish. He didn't want to.

"So?" Otoya's eyebrows lifted.

"I...uh..." He turned. "I... Isn't that Toki?"

The question came out of nowhere, stumping Otoya. At first he thought the redhead was only stalling until he followed the sky blue eyes over to where he saw a meek looking Tokiya Ichinose being coerced into a fancy limo by a big man in a neat suit.

"Tokiya." He called out seeing if the male would look over.

It seemed like the rest of the world stopped when the blue haired boy lifted his head. The slow way that he brought his eyes up, Otoya expected to see his face bruised, lips bloody. But no, he was just met those deep blue eyes, completely shocked and fearful.

"Otoya." Syo hissed. "I didn't say call him."

"Do you know them Ichinose?" The burly man asked, letting go of the teen and straightening his tie.

"Well, I-"

"It doesn't matter. Time is money and I've already paid. Come on." The man grabbed at his arm again.

"No, wait." Tokiya tried.

"Otoya do something." Syo whispered.

"No way, he got himself into this mess."

"You yelled his name."

"I didn't make him meet up with a dude with date-rape-face. I didn't make him go willingly with said man until see by classmates. If he wants to be a whore let him."

"Otoya Yuu don't know that."

"Sure did sound like it."

Syo looked bad at Tokiya to see him stop fighting. His eyes were dead, devoid of any emotion that had once been there. He watched as the other was shoved into the car, and his gaze lingered until the taillights were no longer visible.

"That was awful. How could you be so cruel?"

" It's not like o care about him."

"I thought you had a bet with Tomo. Being an ass is no way to be his friend."

"So you did know." Otoya seethed. "It doesn't matter. It would have happened even if we were friends."

"You're the worst Otoya!" Syo ran off.

Ittoki sighed. Syo just didn't understand. He rolled his eyes and took off after his friend.

"Hey Syo. Need a ride?" Otoya heard someone say. He knew that the blonde had to be close.

"Yeah. Let's go."

Otoya ran to the road looking for where he had gone and who with. But he didn't see anyone. _'Shit.'_ Otoya thought flipping his phone open. "Lost Syo, pissed him off, Kaoru's gunna kill me after Tomo does. Better get hammered."


	6. And ride around

_The Great Escape_

_And ride around_

_Oct. 14_

Hearts were meant to be broken. Ai Mikaze was no exception. He never thought he would or should be an exception to this rule of life. He had watched others suffer from it and knew one day it would also come to claim him. But from all the people he had seen it happen to he knew his first heartbreak would be the most painful. That also seemed like a rule that was unavoidable. It was painful and Inevitable.

'Natsuki, I really did mean it all those years ago." Ai said after their club had let out. He had forcibly dragged the blonde away to where any prying ears couldn't hear their conversation.

"No thanks."

"Huh?"

Natsuki rolled his green eyes at the barely older teen. "I love Syo. I don't need your love."

Those words struck him hard. He had always believed that even though they fought they were still friends. That there was a bond. They had grown up together. But ever since Syo showed up four years ago, he felt like their bond had started to break.

Now it was fractured.

"I'm sorry I'm not good enough for you."

"Ai don't be like that."

"Be like what?" Ai snapped. "This is how I am."

"Don't be so dramatic. You look like a goth, maybe you should start acting like you look."

"You're an ass." The cyan haired teen turned away.

"Wait Ai." Natsuki sighed. "I'm sorry for not considering your feelings."

"Not good enough." Ai started to walk away. "I'm not coming over tomorrow. Just leave me alone."

"Hey, wait! I apologized, Ai."

"So what?" He stopped.

"So what? You're just pissed off and now running away. Like always. How can you say you love me if the only person you ever think about is yourself?"

"Shut up." Another step away.

"Who are you really running from? Is it me? is it Satsuki? or is it yourself?"

With that Ai was gone. He wasn't sure if it was the mention of Satsuki or if it was the fact it was really himself that Ai was running from. He hated to prove the blonde was right, yet he still ran. Ran until he reached his motorcycle then rode away.

* * *

Ai wasn't sure where to go when he pulled into the driveway of his house. He saw _'That Man's'_ car pulled into his normal spot. Ai hated _Him_ , he didn't even want to be around at the same time he visited.

"Dad?" He called.

"We're in the kitchen Ai." His father's kind voice called.

_'The kitchen?'_ Ai thought hopefully.

Walking in he saw _Him,_ sitting at the table smiling at his father. His shaggy brown hair pushed behind his ears, glasses sliding down his nose.

"Ai isn't it wonderful? Hakase came over on a good day." His father, Aine Mikaze smiled back at their guest. "I can finally repay you a little for all the kindness you've shown me. I wish I could do more."

"It's really no problem Aine." Hakase smiled. "I actually came over to refill your medicine. But I'd love to stay for dinner."

Ai frowned. "Don't you have anywhere else to be? Like more patience to help?"

"Ai! That was rude. I am so sorry Hakase, please pay him no mind." AIne glared at his son as he bowed before the doctor. "Upstairs now Ai."

"But-"

"Now!" his father roared as loud as his meek voice would let him.

"Fine." Ai spat.

Instead of going all the way up, he stopped and waited for his father at the base of the steps. In case anything were to happen he would be there . When Aine finally did arrived he refused his son's help, he was far to stubborn, and slowly made his way up.

"I know you don't like him." Aine started once reaching the top only to interrupted.

"He's making you more sick."

"He's helping."

"No, it's like he wants to kill you."

"Ai don't say that. He's a good man and-"

"Hakase hates you cause mom's dead. Why don't you see it? He hates you for surviving when you're so sickly. Mom was so healthy and she ended up dead and he's mad. Just because's he's my uncle ... It means nothing."

"Stop." His father whispered. His eyes brimmed with tears. He sniffed trying not to let them fall.

Everyone knew that Ai looked just like his father, some would go as far as to say he was a perfect replica in looks. He had the same eyes, the same hair, everything, but personality. But then again no one knew his mother. She had a defiant spirit, a loud cheerful voice, and eyes that looked right through you into your soul. She could make the worst day into the best with just a smile.

Not that Ai remembered. Because that was gone, she was gone. His father, Aine, reminded him in that moment how fragile her memory was. He tried so hard to grasp at any memory of her that he could. And Hakase, her older brother, did just that. Sometimes it was hard for Ai to remember since he had grown up with just his father. The memories of his mother had faded with the small part of his childhood that she had been in.

"Fine."

Aine's hand snaked up to grab the blue stone he always had around his neck. It comforted him. It was probably a gift from Ai's late mother. He noticed that he and his father both had a habit of grabbing their hearts because of where that stone fell against his chest. "Be nice to your uncle. He's taking care of us. Don't accuse him of these silly falsehoods. He's always, only ever been kind to us."

"Sure." Ai refused to meet the cyan eyes in front of him. "Mind if I go to a friend's house? I don't want to ruin dinner."

His father smiled. "I'll call you when he's gone."

"Thanks. Oh and if anything happens..."

"I know. Don't worry, have fun."

Ai waited until his dad made his way down the steps, although he stumbled a bit before making it to the bottom. Once he was out of sight Ai reached in his pocket and retrieved his phone. "Hey Kira? Still going to that poetry session?"

* * *

_Oct. 15_

For the first time in his life, Ai wished he had held his tongue for just one more day. Talking to Natsuki was unavoidable. Though he did try his best, but the last period with Reiji Kotobuki was the hardest. After all he sat next to him, but Natsuki seemed off in his own world.

"Mikaze." Reiji called breaking Ai out of his trance. "See me after class."

Ai blushed, or rather failed at trying not to let the color show across his face, as the class looked at him, some giggling and some whispering. It took only a few seconds for him to retain his usual demeanor, though his face glowed brightly for a while longer.

"Whatever."

"Now class-" He stared at the board not even reading it. He wanted to go home. Hakase stayed late the night before and he refused to come home until that man left. So he had barely gotten any sleep. "So make sure you decide by Monday." Reiji finished with a smile.

"Huh?" Ai whispered to Tokiya, who flinched then looked up from their desk only to shrug at him. _'Great nobody was paying attention. I hope this isn't important.'_

"Ai." Reiji called after the bell rang. "Your father called last night."

"Sorry." His blue eyes met the floor.

"You know you are always welcome at my place. Just don't make him worry, okay."

"Yeah."

"How are you?" Reiji's question caught him off guard.

"Yeah why?"

"No reason."

It was question for a while until Ai looked up. "Reiji , when are you going to take us away from this crap? Better do it soon or dad might fall for someone else. Don't wait to long."

He swore he could hear the brunette mutter as left the room. "Brat."

* * *

Ai loved hanging out with Kira, but the older male usually brought his college friends, that Ai was not fond of. Like Kiryuin Van and Amakusa Shion, well Shion reminded the cyan teen of Cecil so he was okay with him but Van was at total playboy.

"It's really to bad." Van yawned stretching his arm out, resting it on Shion's shoulder, once Kira had left for the bathroom.

"What is?" Ai looked over.

"Kira's other half stopped replying to his messages." Shion said fiddling with this striped jacket.

"And he's not ready to move on or say it's over. So I can't ask him out or even hit on him yet." Van finished with a frustrated sigh.

"Maybe if you stop thinking with your dick for once you might get somewhere in life." Ai mumbled throwing his money down on the low coffee table. "Tell Kira I'll text him later."

"Sure." Shion waved.

The cyan haired teen walked out of the cafe, and almost immediately spotted a short blonde, in somewhat strange clothing, pushing his way through the crowd.

"Hey Syo." He called without thinking. He lifted his keys giving them a little jingle. "Need a lift?"

Syo's head snapped up from looking at the ground. Slowly he found the source of the voice that had called to him. "Yeah. Let's go."

Ai waited for Syo. before leading him to his sleek black motorcycle.. Out of the corner of his eye he thought he saw Otoya looking around.

"So what are you doing here?" Ai asked.

"Was hanging out with a friend but he was being an ass." Syo grunted in a low small voice as he tried to keep up with Ai on the the busy sidewalks.

_'Yup had to be Otoya.'_ Ai grabbed his hand pulling him near. "That sucks."

"Yeah. What about you?"

"Nothing much."

"Oh?"

"Yeah." Ai shrugged. He looked down at his friend. His eyes looked sad. It was the same kind of sad that Kira had in his eyes. "So have you ever thought about who you want to date?"

Syo looked up to meet Ai's cyan eyes before quickly averting them again. His lips formed a tight frown. "Why?"

"Heard Yamato was gunna ask you out, cause he's had a crush on you since forever." Ai said. "He's Hyuga's younger brother so i thought you might go for him. Unless you're taken."

Syo's eyes almost teared up. "No. And you?"

"Interested."

Syo scoffed. "No way."

"I'm in the friend zone with the person I like. Maybe it's better that way."

Syo chewed his lip. "Really?" But it wasn't really a question that needed answering.

Ai dropped his hand, grabbing the extra helmet, that he kept on the back of his bike, and passed to the blonde. "My house or yours?"

"I've never been to yours."

_'He smiled.'_ Ai thought while looking at that hopeful face. "There's a good reason for that, but today is special. So enjoy this while you can."

"Your place then."

* * *

Ai gulped. He was there. Why, on the only day he brought a friend home, why was he there. He awkwardly parked his bike between the car and the side of the garage. He clenched his fists and unclenched them all the way to the door. Taking a deep breath he let it squeak open, of course it couldn't be quiet the only day he wanted it to.

"Ai?"

"I'm home." He looked down at Syo. "Brought a friend."

Faintly they both could hear something, that sounded like a cup, crash against the floor. Ai would have been alarmed, but he didn't have time to with the sound of hurried footfalls rushing towards him. Aine's head poked out.

"I can't believe it." The older man gasped.

Syo's eyes widened at the sight of the lithe man in white. "Ai you have a brother?"

The teen laughed. "Syo this is my dad, dad this is Syo."

"No way!"

"Oh my you have more friends than just Kira and Natsuki. Aine smiled. "Come on in. You'll be in your room right?"

Ai gave him a look. "We would ruin teat time, so yes."

"Oh I'll shoo him away quickly, then be out of your hair."

Syo looked confused at the whole situation, but Ai shook his head. "It's fine. Come on Syo."


	7. And make peace with an empty town

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> My beta, at the time, made the wise decision to edit out a bulimia scene. I think she made the right choice, so I'm leaving it out.

_The Great Escape_

_And make peace with an empty town_

_Oct. 17_

Tokiya shut his eyes. The bright glow of the florescent lighting in the small bathroom was beginning to give him a headache. But shutting his eyes only did little to alleviate his pain, and even if it did help, it brought on a new onslaught of problems. Every time his eyes fluttered shut he saw it, what he was most afraid of. Otoya's disgusted face looking at him.

_Whore_

He was sure that the redhead had totally misunderstood the situation. But now how could he face him? He couldn't even build up the courage to try to explain that day. And what Tokiya fear: Otoya would never look at him the same again. Well not just Otoya, but any of his new classmates. He had done so much work to escape from his old lifestyle only to fall right back into it again. No, he didn't want that. What did he try so hard for?

"I hate this." He whispered sitting on the closed toilet seat. His knees drawn up to his chest, his left cheek resting on the hard cap. Pale hands playing with the sleek, cool, sharp, metal. He twisted it, flipping it over the back of his hand only to catch it again.

Faintly he remembered the last time he had tried something like this. It was hell. When his mother caught him, which she could always somehow tell, she had flown off the handle. She burst into his room before the instrument of his demise could even graze his porcelain skin. For what seemed to be hours the woman screeched at him, telling him how important his life was, and he couldn't die, and she wouldn't let him. She then locked every sharp object away for three years. He was sure that he was still monitored while using anything that could tear through his flesh.

After all; She couldn't lose Hayato again.

"I never asked for this." He murmured t to himself. "I want to be free. But i'm scared. So scared. It's to much, I just want...But I can't. Why am I not strong enough? It would only be a second of pain. Yet I can't bring myself to do it. What is holding me back? I want this to end."

If only he didn't have this weakness he would be free. He wouldn't have to worry about school or work. He wouldn't have to worry about what he does and says, he wouldn't have to mind his mother and obey her every word. He could just sleep. He was tired. So tired he felt as if he could reach this eternal sleep, maybe it would be a good thing he didn't wake up. All the heaviness would go away, the worry and stress. There would be nothing but blissful peace. So why? Why did he always stop and wait to be rescued by someone who would never show up? Someone who could take all the pain and suffering away without having to go to this length. Why was he waiting for a fairy-tale prince when all he ended up with was his evil step mother?

As if it were fate, she started to bang on the door. Her voice loud and angry "Tokiya? You open this door right now, or so help me there won't be one by tomorrow!"

He jumped in fear, or rather it was some what mechanically built into him to flinch at everything. What a coward he was. But it was now or never. Slowly, as if tempting his luck, he opened the new Swiss army knife that his manager had given to him. Surely by now his mother had learned of the present, and that's why she was so insistent on getting into the room. Knowing her she wanted to take it away. With good reason. This wasn't the first time he had tried, nor did he think it would be the last.

He had barely made the vertical incision by the time she had pried opened the door using her favorite, no doubt, credit card to for the jammed door open. She was a master at all things that involved her card and money. If she had more time she probably would have payed someone to do it for her.

"Tokiya!" She rushed over to him.

Although it was only the tiniest of cuts she placed a damp towel over it. Frantically, with tears forming in her eyes, she searched for a bandage or anything to cover it, never taking more than two steps from him.

"Mom."

"What the hell were you thinking?" She yelled finally finding the wrapping she so desperately sought out. "You could have died. I told you after the first time; if you ever felt like doing that again do it horizontally. What would I have done if you died? Do you realize how much work I put into you?"

He winced. He wanted to anything but a bother to people. "I'm sorry."

"You'd better be. I just can't have you die. Don't you realize that Hayato must live on? I was lucky enough toget two of you and you both are trying to mess everything up! Why did this have to happen to me? All i want is for Hayato to be the best. He must live and not do anything foolish like this!"

He knew that was coming. Ever since the 'death' of his 'late' brother, he had no longer been able to live. Tokiya was Hayato, but Hayato wasn't Tokiya. He could never be as wonderful as his brother. He never wanted to be.

And his mother just couldn't let that happen. She refused to let Hayato, or rather his fame and success go. She dug her overly price fake nails into the memory of his success and clung to it. She would keep it within her grasp for as long as she could. As long as Tokiya was alive. So all she had to do was keep him from killing himself and she kept her puppet, her Hayato.

"You love me, don't you Tokiya?" She asked looking down at him, more tears threatening to spill forth like a waterfall of raw emotion. "You love me and Hayato, right?"

He gulped. "Of course."

"Then promise me that next time you'll do it the way that I taught you." Her voice seemed weaker than her glare.

"Promise." There was no hesitation in his dead voice.

She knelt down in front of his taking his fragile arm into her palm. "That's my good boy. Let's not tell your dad about this, okay. He would make more of a fuss that I would."

He almost cried. For a moment, a mere moment, he felt like it may have seemed like she actually care for him. But he wasn't some naive little ten year old anymore. He knew after eleven years with her, what she was really like. And just to prove it to himself he asked in the loudest voice he could manage.

"Mom, do you love me?"

She finished wrapping his arm. "There you go, good as new."

But she never gave him an answer.

* * *

_Oct. 19_

Tokiya was stressed. His mother hadn't taken her eyes off of him when ever he was at home. The only time he found that he really had to himself was at school. But he realized, as he sat in his last period class with Reiji chattering away, that even these simple times were not truly peaceful and would soon come to an end.

"So everyone, I ended up giving you an extra. Now get into groups of four and I'll explain more of the project to you." His sing song voice rang out.

There was some shuffling but no one from his table moved, or even really looked up. With Ai and Natsuki butting heads and Otoya off in his own world, he wondered if they even realized they were in the middle of a class. His blue eyes wondered over to the redhead listlessly looking at the board. His breath hitched. There was no way he would even dare to ask Otoya to help or partner with him.

"Ai, Natsuki stop fighting." Reiji yelled. "I feel bad for you Tokiya, having to deal with them. Knock it off you two!"

"Eh?"

"Now that everyone is in groups..."

Their teacher continued. "The four of you will write a paper together. You will have until exams in march. There is no limit to what can be written, but the paper must be five or more pages long with a slideshow presentation and an oral presentation."

"Huh? What?" Otoya finally snapped out of his daze.

Kotobuki rolled his eyes. "Well Ittoki if you were paying attention you would know what's going on right now. I just hope that one of your group was paying attention because from the looks of it you three will need to have this entire day revised."

"My group? Three?"

"Ittoki see me after class." He sighed. " On second thought all four of you see me after class."

Tokiya froze. Was he in trouble? He had work tonight, he couldn't afford to get a detention.

"Shut up!" Ai screamed shooting to his feet. After a few seconds it was obvious that he was talking to Natsuki. Tokiya hadn't even realized that the two had continued fighting after Reiji's complaints.

"You four might just be the death of me." Reiji said massaging his temples.

* * *

_'Just breathe.'_ He told himself. _'It's just another hour. I'm almost done.'_

"Hayato?"His manager called. "You almost ready?"

"Yeah, just a minute." He brushed the spiked hair from his face.

"Hayato. Let me in please." The man cooed outside his dressing room door.

"The door's unlocked." He started to panic, his clothing was messy, surely he would be punished.

"Is everything okay?"

The blue haired teen turned his head. "Nya~ of course everything's okay."

His manager's eyes fell upon him. "Your mother was worried about you. If there is anything you need just tell me. " He ran his hand down Tokiya's back.

"I'm fine, Himura-chan!" He said brightly.

"You know," The brown haired man lightly traced circles on his back. "We could always cancel your next appointment, if you're not feeling up to it."

Tokiya held in his groan. This had been happening ever since he took over for his brother, he wondered if the creepy man tried to molest him as well. Every once in a while his bispecticaled manager would be needy like this.

"Himura-chan, you know we can't do that nya~!" He forced himself to act happy, act like Hayato. He hated it.

"You seem tense." His manager purred. He then straightened. "We only have this interview left then you can go home."

Tokiya jumped smiling the first real smile he had actually had in days. "Yatta!"


	8. We can make it right

_The Great Escape_

_We can make it right_

_Oct. 31_

Cecil wasn't a neat freak or anything, but he had been pacing around the living room for about two hours making sure that nothing was out of line. Everything had to be in place. Just for today. Since it was something that Syo had asked for, everything had to be right. After all, Cecil would give the moon, the stars, even the world to the little blonde if he had a chance. So he wouldn't settle for anything less than perfection. It simply wasn't possible, since Syo deserved the best.

"What do you mean you won't pick me up? How many times did I go out of my way for you, asshole. I remember any time you needed a favor or someone to lie to your folks you called me." Otoya obnoxiously yelled into his phone. No doubt their parents, and probably the whole street, hear him screaming. He may have been across the hall, behind a closed door, and in the kitchen but Cecil felt like his angry half brother was right next to him. "Fine, whatever. I always hated drinking with you anyways." The redhead slammed his phone shut making it to the living room so he could plop down on the couch.

"Being ditched sucks, but if you talk to them like that you'll lose friends." Cecil snickered.

"It's the funniest thing." Otoya glared at him throwing his combat boot covered feet on the nicely cleaned table. "All of my drinking buddies refused to pick me up today or aren't down for drinking cause they suddenly care about school tomorrow. It's always the same lame excuse. I mean I know they aren't A plus students, but six of them had a family reunion today alone. But even more than that, All of my text were mysteriously deleted last night. Looks like someone didn't know how to use my phone to only delete selected ones."

"Mmm." Cecil hummed putting a finger to his chapped lips. "Maybe it's a sign you should stay home tonight."

Otoya's mouth formed a thin line. His brow furrowed. "Just because of your creepy little crush on Syo I have to be here for your party. You're such a brat. Just because that stupid little blonde wants me here doesn't mean i want to be here. For once stop thinking of yourself, you selfish little shit."

There were no loud screams. In fact there was very little anger behind his words, but that didn't stop Cecil from getting upset. It didn't stop him from felling hurt.

"Oh, I'm the selfish one? It's one Sunday I'm asking for, not the rest of your life. Name one time, and just one time, you have ever done something for someone else. Something That wouldn't give back or help you in the long run. You've never done anything for me!" He was on the brink of tears but forced himself to continue. "Sure, when I ask this one little, simple, thing of you, and you said no. So yes, I went behind your back and contacted your friends and begged them to make up any excuse to not take you out today. I admit it! But who could blame me? I know you hate me, but you also know how important tonight is for me. Just this once think of me. Not as the snotty runt of a brother you hate and didn't want, but as a person who only wants to make someone they care for happy. Even if it's only for an hour, it means the world to me."

Otoya stiffened at his words. So he hated Cecil, huh? That was news to him. He had always believed that hate and dislike were two very different things. And there were several times, that his half brother probably couldn't or chose no to remember, where he had done thins for him and expected nothing in return. But since Cecil was making such a big deal, he wouldn't, not couldn't, prove him wrong. So the redhead gritted his teeth. "I'll stay for your stupid party. But you had better tell Ai to get some beer."

The brunette's green eyes brightened. His anger instantly vanishing. "Really? Thank you so much! I'll text him right now. Wait how will he be able to buy it?"

"He looks just like his dad. He's done it before."

"Okay." Cecil smiled.

Otoya left the room with his younger sibling nosediving for his phone.

* * *

Syo sighed as he fiddled with his blue phone. He knew that he was going over Otoya's. But... He really wanted to call Yamato. They had started talking the Monday after Ai had dropped him off at his house. The Monday after Otoya had been such a dick. The same day that Tokiya refused to speak to them. Talking, texting, laughing, and hanging out. Now all Syo wanted to do was call him and talk about little nothings.

No, even that was a small lie that Syo had repeatedly told himself. What he really, truly, wanted was to call Ren. He want to hear that silky voice bellow out his name in anger, stringing together words of profanity and cursing him for calling so late. He wanted to hear that girly laugh, that passionate singing voice. He wanted to hear Ren, and nothing could replace that longing no matter how much he tried to deny it.

The blonde dropped his phone on the soft cushion below, and brought his hands up to cover his eyes. _'How long has it been?'_ He thought to himself in disbelief. How could he still be holding on to that lingering hope, as small as it was, that Ren would call him back. Would apologize and beg for his forgiveness. His heart wanted to break with each passing day that his love, or ex-boyfriend, didn't call. But how could something that had been shattered into a million pieces break even more? Was it even possible?

At that moment, with Syo sitting in the center of a self-pity party, his phone trilled out loudly, almost echoing in the quietness of the empty house. For a moment, a single yet excruciating moment, Syo had hope that his Ren had called. But his eye gazed upon the s screen to see a name that was not Ren's. His impossible hopes had been crushed, because it was none other than Cecil.

"Hello." Syo answered, disappointment ringing deep within his voice.

Something that went almost unnoticed, almost. "H-hey do you want someone to pick you up?"

"Oh-oh yeah." He stuttered. "Who's all coming? Who should I call for a ride?"

"Well, Ai had to make a special trip to the store so I'll text him. I'll call you back and let you know what's going on." Cecil said as something crashed in the background. "Oh man, Otoya! I have to go see you soon."

Syo sighed in understanding as he hung up. Of course Cecil would want to handle it. He probably just wanted a valid excuse to call their cyan haired friend. Syo could totally understand that. Wanting to talk to the person you loved was natural, was it?

That's why, no matter what, he wanted to hear Ren's voice again. Even if it made him look like an idiot. Even if His ex had already changed his number, he wanted to try. Because he loved Ren enough to keep trying in a hopeless battle. So with shaken hands, he picked up the device, and punched in the other's number. As it rang he only prayed that Ren had yet to change his number.

"Hello?"

Syo took a deep breath. "Ren."

There was a pregnant pause. Syo even had to check to make sure the other hadn't hung up on him. "Syo." He finally spoke. "I really don't have time to talk right now. So if you don't mind-"

"I do!" Syo yelled. "I do mind. Please just a minute is all I'm asking for. Just a minute of your time, when you took years of mine." The last part he hadn't meant to say. It just came out on it's own. Like his thoughts had no filter.

"Syo I really just want to go back to bed. I have a big test tomorrow, my college career depends on this."

"Ren...Why? Please just tell me why. I really don't understand. Did I say something? Did I not give you enough time? I really really tried. I just want to know why."

There was a sigh on the other end. Heavy, like the weight of the world had just been set on his shoulders with the simple questions he asked. "I don't have to explain my reasoning to you."

"Yes you do! I don't understand what went wrong. How and I supposed to move on like this? Just tell m-"

"Syo." His calm voice cut in like a knife. "Let it go. We're over." He didn't give time for a response before he hung up, leaving Syo somewhat bewildered.

The blonde flung his phone across the room, not caring that that back had popped off and the battery spilled to the floor. All he could do was bring his hands up to clench fistfuls of he matted golden locks. For the first time in years he willingly let himself cry, tears dripping down his face as he cursed Ren's name. In an empty house, were the walls echoed, he allowed himself to give in and succumb to the despair and agony of losing what made his life feel worthwhile.

* * *

Cecil laughed at one of Natsuki's lame jokes. He really didn't want to talk to him, though the feeling was probably mutual. They were rivals, they both wanted to claim Syo as their own. He wished that he hadn't even invited the tall. stupid, blonde. He also wished his lazy older brother would do something other than lounge around on the couch. He had made it perfectly obvious that he didn't want to be there, and the only reason he was staying was for the beer that Ai was bringing. But, unfortunately for both of the brothers, Ai sure was taking his sweet time.

Everything was going to be perfect when the blonde finally arrived. he had gotten his parents a nice table at a nice restaurant and great tickets for some opera they would like. He had saved and planned for this day for so long. So hopefully the other three members of the party would play a video game and get drunk so he could drag Syo away and tell him everything he had wanted to say for the last two years. Then Syo would be his and not Natsuki's. Besides, Natsuki had someone to fall back on. Cecil would be alone forever if this didn't work or so his fourteen year old mind thought.

"We're here!" Ai called opening the front door.

Otoya sprang to life, his mind and Cecil's thinking the same thing, only he decided to voice his opinion loudly. "Finally!"

The redhead ran off to greet their guests, or rather the beer. "Hey Otoya."

"Hey beer... I mean Ai." He smiled.

"Whatever dude, I know you meant beer." Ai rolled his eyes.

"Hey Syo!" Cecil called rounding the corner.

The blonde sighed, pushing his hair away from his somewhat red eyes. "Hi."

Although he had a bad feeling, Cecil waited until his brother and the other two got settled, games and porn on the short table and beer on the couch, so even approach Syo. As they started with their stories Cecil offered to lead Syo to the bathroom so help with his puffy eyes. He would stop on the way wall-slam* Syo, and then follow the plan.

"Syo?"

The blonde barely acknowledged his existence once they has separated from the others. He had barely said anything since arriving in the first plcae.

"Syo?"

"Huh?" he answered while making his way to the bathroom.

"There's something I wanted to talk to you about."

"Eh?" He looked up only to find himself corner against the wall, Cecil's arm resting just over his head. He hadn't realized how much taller the brunette was. "Oi, oi! This isn't a manga." He looked up, his gaze a bit more fierce than it was, but still softened and sad.

"Syo I really... I really like you."

"Yeah enough to wall-slam me. Move."

"Seriously Syo."

"Huh?" Syo finally met his bright green eyes. They shinned and looked as thought he were absolutely honest. "o-oh I get it. Th-this must be your practice fo-for Ai. I-I'll go get him for y-you."

"Syo, don't you understand? it's not Ai. It's never been Ai. It's you. Everything I've done has been for you. It's always been you." Cecil leaned in closer.

"N-no that ca-can't be true. I'm sorry." Syo whisper as a sob wracked through his petite body. "I'm so sorry."


	9. Chorus Part I

_The Great Escape_

_Chorus Part I_

_Nov. 21_

Natsuki felt horribly uncomfortable to say the least. He hadn't been to Ai's house in years, even though when they were young it seemed they were glued at the hip. And to be honest, he hadn't planned on going over, especially since the older boy confessed his undying love to him, and was rejected harshly. He had intended to hurt that cyan eyed boy and he didn't even feel guilty. Perhaps he was a little bit more like his older brother than he liked to admit. That was until Cecil's Halloween party. He sat there and listened to him talk about his other friends to Otoya while Cecil tried to do something shady. Speaking of which, he hadn't seen the brunette in a while. But the way he talked about his friend, what was his name Kira, really pissed him off. Ai was supposed to be there to love him! Not replace him after a failed confession. He was supposed to be there when, and if, Syo turned him down. Ai wasn't supposed to move on. He belonged to Natsuki.

Not only was he feeling awkward about being at Ai's, but Tokiya and Otoya seemed to have had a small tiff. Neither one made any moves to acknowledge or talk to one another. They sat in uncomfortable silence since Ai had left the room to get them something to drink. Damn why was he taking so long? The kitchen was only a room away and it had been like five minutes, not to mention that he had been in and out of the room for the last hour. But that didn't really matter, because their redheaded friend had just arrived, being late as usual.

This was quite possibly the worst Sunday that he had ever had to endure.

"Sorry I took so long." Ai broke the silence by walking into the room with a small silver tray filled with cups. "My dad called."

"Whatever man. You didn't even greet me. I had to have Natsuki let me in." Otoya rolled his eyes. "Let's get this over with."

"Chill dude. I had things to do, and you are invading my home." Ai sat, between where Otoya had plopped carelessly down on the couch and where Tokiya knelled in front of the table, next to the white sofa. "This isn't one of those things we can rush through, i know that. But you can't expect to invite yourself and everyone else over randomly, then be the last to show up."

"Don't want to bother your old man with us?" Natsuki smirked.

"Exactly." Ai gritted his teeth. "It's bothersome. Maybe you should leave and make less trouble for me."

"So confrontational." Otoya cooed.

"Shut up."

Um... Ai?" Tokiya mumbled whilst fidgeting.

"What?" The cyan haired teen said in an irritated voice. It was far meaner than he had meant it at the shy teen.

"N-never mind."

"Hey, sorry." Ai scratched the back of his neck. "What did you need?"

"I...um... the bathroom."

"First door upstairs, on the right." He said. "And be quiet."

"Y-yes." He stood then bolted away from the trio.

"Man, he drives me nuts." Natsuki sighed. "He's like a small puppy. It's annoying."

"Yeah. He's totally terrified of me. When I went over his house, he completely freaked o-"

Otoya interrupted. "Why did you go over there? Wait when?"

"Well when I realized that I didn't have his number and you are mean enough to not invite him. Besides he lives across the street so it's no big deal. But he was so shaken when I talked to him, I thought he would faint."

"If you showed up at my door looking like you do today I would be scared too." Otoya folded his arms over his chest. "All black and a scowl like that. I bet you make kids cry just by looking at them."

"Dude, shut up." He pushed Otoya.

"You're making me wanna cry right now. I'd hate to meet a person like you in a dark ally."

"At least I'm not a total ass."

"Well," Natsuki interrupted their spat, just what he needed everyone working on their project to be fighting. "I hope he warms up to us enough to actually work on our project."

* * *

Tokiya couldn't help to let out a small sigh of relief as he reached to top of the stairs. It was way to stressful being surrounded by those guys. The three of them were just more than he could handle. He shook his head. He shouldn't be so negative but they were each scary in their own way. The goth that wore a scowl that seemed permanently etched into his features, a judgmental frat boy wanna be, and a two-faced narcissist. They all seemed super different and super scary. He just wanted a moment away from them.

"Ai?" A small voice to the left croaked out.

In a very timid, even to himself it sounded weak, he said. "N-no, just a classmate." He didn't dare move.

"Oh." The male's called again, this time with a hint of disappointment. "Would you mind coming here anyways? Or just by the door if you aren't comfortable coming in."

Tokiya did as he was told. He pushed the slightly opened door opened just a crack more so he could see inside. He had expected it to be dark and gloomy inside, despair steeping out in waves, but it wasn't like that at all. In fact he felt very calm looking in. It looked as if he had just stepped into the ocean. The sea foam green walls almost sparkled from the sun's beams, that drifted in from the open window. As if professionally done there were fish and bubbles drawn on the walls. It all looked so real. So peaceful. And in the corner of the room, near the opened window, was a very pale man with bright bright cyan eyes.

"Hello." The man smiled brightly setting a black bound book down on his lap as he gave a small wave. "I'm sorry for not greeting you when you arrived, little one."

"O-oh. I'm sorry, my name is Tokiya Ichinose. I'm sorry for intruding."

The man motioned him closer. "Not at all. You're welcome here anytime. You are our newest neighbor after all. I am Ai's father Aine."

"Father?" Tokiya took a shocked step back, almost falling over. "B-but you're so young."

"I get that a lot." He gave a laugh that turned into a strained cough.

"I-is there anything I c-can get for you." He took a daring step closer clenching his fists at his sides.

"No no, I'm fine. Although if it isn't to much trouble could you stay for a small chat?"

"Is that really okay?" Tokiya looked, finding a chair placed in the opposite corner of the bed.

"Now, why wouldn't it be? Ai hardly ever brings his friends home to meet me, perhaps he's embarrassed of me. Although I did fear for a while he didn't have any."

"B-but I'm not really his friend. I'm just a classmate that he was forcibly paired up with. He probably won't even talk to me after our project is done."

"Don't be silly. That can't be true. I heard him and that one little blonde boy, he brought home, talking about you. Oh what was his name, S-..."

"Syo?"

"Ah yes, that's it. Syo seemed to like you. He's such a sweet boy, so you must be wonderful too."

"Oh?" I haven't really talked to whom much since transferring in." Tokiya admitted.

Aine gave a light chuckle. "Well I hope one day you and Ai can be good friends. You live right across the way so you can feel free to come here anytime. Even if you and Ai don't become friends, we could always be chatting buddies, Toki."

"Toki?"

"Oh? I heard Syo call you that and assumed that's what they called you. Is that not okay?"

"It's fine."

"Good." Aine smiled. "I-"

"Tokiya." Ai said standing in the doorway. "Come on, some bothering my dad and let's get to work."

"Y-yes." The scared teen jumped up.

"He's not a bother. You could stand to be a little nicer Ai. And it's my fault to asking him to talk to me." The father prepared to stand up for Tokiya.

"That's alright." Tokiya smiled. "I've taken far to much of your time already. You should probably be resting."

Ai watched him shuffle out of the room but before he could follow he heard, "Ai."

"Yes?"

"Be nice to him. It really was all my fault." Aine sighed. "He's so timid I fear that your anger at me might scare him away. That would be a shame."

"I'm not angry."

"With a face like that it's hard to tell sometimes." The father didn't look convinced. "Just be nice. I'd like to talk to him some more on another day."

Ai was shocked. Usually his father minded his own, trying his hardest not to butt into Ai's social life. But this time he wanted to know someone Ai had brought home. That had the teen smile. "Sure."

* * *

Syo twitched at his brother's suggestion. With such a horrible idea you'd think a person would at least knock first, not come barreling in. He could, didn't even want to, think about it. Thanksgiving dinner... at Kaoru's girlfriend's house. With her family. He had said that he wanted Syo there too. He had to be there for what was going to happen. And the younger of the two couldn't even speak. He couldn't think. Hell no! He didn't want this time, that was meant for families, with her and her family. He would rather spend this year just like the rest, waiting and hoping that their parents would come home to spend it with them and be disappointed when they didn't show up. But he couldn't say that. He and Kaoru hadn't been very close since their little fight. Of course they had made up, but there was still that distance that refused to dissipate. Ever since Ai dropped him off that day...

"Well...I..."

"What?" His older brother looked down at him with those eyes.

"Well it's just... I..."

"You don't want to." Kaoru finished. "Damn it Syo, I was just trying to be nice. To close this gap. But it's like you don't want me to. I wish you would just talk to me and tell me what you mean! When did we stop telling each other all of our secrets? When did we...?"

"I just didn't want to piss you off." It was a small voice that steeped out.

"If you didn't want that you should have just talked to me! You are so depressed lately. I can't read your mind, I don't know what your thinking. Just talk to me!"

"I don't want to." Syo grabbed his nearest pillow and held it close.

"That's the problem." Kaoru yelled. "What could be so bad that you cou-"

"I'm gay."

Kaoru's face dropped as he paled. His arms, that were folded across his chest sent slack and fell to his sides. Then he left. He just exited Syo's room leaving his brother sitting on his bed, cradling a pillow in his arms.

"I knew you wouldn't understand." Syo mumbled into his pillow.

Thank goodness Haruka and Tomo would understand.


	10. Tonight will change our lives

_Dec. 3_

Otoya couldn't wait for the weekend to start. He hates school. He hated Fridays, even his friends. And why was he being so pessimistic? Because his father, his real dad back in Japan, didn't answer his calls, emails, ect the night before. That, in return, ruined his whole Friday.

"Damn old man." He muttered.

It also didn't help that Tokiya kept trying to sneak a peak at him through the corner of his deep blue eye. He really just wanted the teen to stop and mind his own business. He wanted nothing more than to yell at him for things that were out of both of there control. Otoya wanted to scream and take out his anger on the frail teen.

"Hey look." Natsuki said. His head titled as green eyes glared outside. He looked bored with his elbow leaning into the desk, hand holding his cheek up. "It's snowing."

"How childish." Ai retorted.

"It's the first snow of the season." Natsuki said far to harshly.

And that was it, with that they started. Otoya knew that his group project was screwed because nobody got along. But, on the upside, that distracted Tokiya from him, drawing his blue gaze away letting Otoya have a small sigh of relieve. Now it was the redheads turn to look at the other.

His eyes looked tired, dark bags smudged across the pale skin underneath. His face looked pinched, maybe not so much in excruciating pain but still hurt. He slouched down in his chair. Thins arms crossed on the wood in front of him.

"T-Tokiya." He couldn't help it, he had to say his name. To make those fierce eyes look at him again, to let him know that the other was not just the hollow shell he looked to be.

He did. He turned and met Otoya's red gaze with those eyes. "Yes?" His voice was calm.

"Sorry, never mind. It's nothing."

"Are you sure? If you need any help, you can always ask me."

Otoya almost said no. Almost. "Hey when are you free to work on the project?"

Tokiya bit his lip. "Sometime over the break is fine. But I don't think I can do anything until after Christmas."

"Ai, Natsuki, is the cool with you?" He called a bit louder hoping to break them out of their silly squabble.

"That's fine." Ai shrugged. "Who's house?"

"Not mine. Satsuki is having a bunch of his college friends over during the holidays." Natsuki chimed in.

"Satsuki?" Tokiya mumbled.

"Hakase is spending until the new year with us. He won't mind, but you guys know, I'd rather not." Ai said waving his hand in front of his face as if to purge the air of a foul smell.

"Hakase?" Tokiya mumbled again.

"I hate my house. How about we all go to Syo's?"

"I could ask my mother if we could do it at mine, so we won't have to bother Syo." Tokiya offered quietly.

"That would be great." Ai commented dully

"Hey! Are you four even paying attention anymore? You know you are in the middle of class." Reiji screamed at them, slamming his book down.

"No." Oyota and Ai answered honestly.

"You four will be the death of me. TGIF, I guess." Their teacher rolled his eyes, grateful that he wouldn't have to put up with their stupidity over the weekend.

"Oh actually," Tokiya added almost silently. "I'm free today just not at my place."

"Then mine!" Natsuki beamed.

"For heaven's sake, shut up!" Reiji shouted.

* * *

 

Kotomi had a rather sour look on her face as the boys returned home. Not that Otoya cared if she was upset or not. She would get over it like always, having that small smile she usually wore return to her face. But he could tell, even from the kitchen doorway, how frustrated she was.

"Mom, we're home. Can I borrow the car for a few hours?"

"Sit down, Otoya." She said, her voice stern. He hadn't heard her like this in years. It was almost as if he had forgotten she could get pissed off. "We need to talk for a minute."

He gazed fell on her before turning to his brother. Cecil gave him a quick node before disappearing up the stairs.

"What?"

"Your father called." She said taking a sip from her teacup. Whatever was inside was probably already cold, as it looked as though she had been there for a while. "He's already bought you a plan ticket. You'll be going to Japan for the next two weeks. On Monday request all of your absent work."

"W-what?" He questioned in disbelief. His father had planned to spend Christmas with him. Even though they hadn't talked in forever how father still wanted him. It was the best thing he could have asked for.

"I'd start packing soon. He says you can stay till the new year if you want, but I'd rather it was only two weeks. I won't stop you though. We both know how much you loved going to the shrine. But if you want to come home early that's okay as well."

He thought for a second. "I have a project to work on tonight." He retorted.

"You have until Tuesday morning. You should make sure to have everyone's number so if they need your input they can text you."

"Sure."

He watched as his mother sighed, and for once, he felt incredibly happy. He couldn't believe it. It was far to good to be true.

"Thank you." He whispered.

* * *

Otoya paced in front of Ai's house. He had been feeling nice for once and told Ai that he would try his and Tokiya over to Natsuki's. But he didn't realize how nervous he would be. His cyan haired friend still had some chores to be done, and he didn't want to hang out with Tokiya whole he waited. He had yet to apologize to the teen. Not talking to Syo, the blonde wanted nothing to do with him till he made amends, taught him that he should maybe watch what he says sometimes. But how could be help it, speaking his mind was part of who he was. It's what made him Otoya Ittoki.

"Ai, are you ready yet?" He whinned into his phone.

"No, not yet. And the more you call and ask the longer it will take. Just go get Tokiya, I'll be out soon."

"But Ai!"

"Just go idiot." Ai hung up.

Otoya wanted to throw his phone into the mount of snow. But he couldn't. He needed his phone. What if his dad called? Grudgingly he made his way across the icy street. Biting down on his lip, he knocked.

"Coming." The door opened and a frizzy, slightly wet, blue head popped out. "Ittoki?"

"Yeah, hey. Didn't Ai tell you I was picking you both up?"

"No."

"Oh." Otoya turned. "Well I am. My car's across the street. Hurry up and get ready."

"You can come in. I'll only be a minute."

"I'd really rather not-"

"Is it because of that time?" Tokiya tilted his head. "I know what it looked like, so I don't think you were out of line. But I can explain if you feel uncomfortable."

" I just-"

"Come in."

Otoya did. He didn't want to enter the house, but it was cold outside. Looking around the first thing he noted was how normal it felt. He realized he knew nothing about Tokiya.

"Oh hey." He said as the blue haired teen was closing the door. "I'm going to Japan for a while. If you need me for the project text me."

Ichinose blushed. "May I have your number then?"

"Sure dude."

* * *

_Dec. 7_

Otoya hated looking around and not finding his father. He didn't see anyone he knew or recognized. Looking down at his phone, he had no messages or missed calls. No one cared if he was safe or having a good time. Not that he was.

He had waited for a hour at the airport before anyone had even bothered to show up. And seeing his dad again didn't exactly go as he had hoped it would. In his mind, he saw his dad ready to welcome him back with loving arms. Waiting for him with tears in his eyes.

That is not how it happened.

His father showed up late, looking bored. "There you are." He laughed. "Sorry I forgot what time your plan landed."

Otoya gritted his teeth. I was okay because his father was a busy man.

"I hope you don't mind sharing a room." Saotome said once they were both belted into the car.

"What? Why, with who?"

"With my stepson. I bet you didn't know your old man go remarried. Well kinda. It's hard to explain. You'll understand when we get there."

"Why didn't you tell me? How long?"

"Well..."

"How long!"

Saotome didn't look up from the road. His red eyebrows furrowed. "A few years."

Otoya folded his arms over his chest. "You could have told me. I would have been happy for you."

"It's not something that's really easy to say. Besides I thought Kotomi would have told you by now."

"Like mom tells me anything."

"She probably had her reasons. So how's school going?"

Otoya groaned. It was going to be a long way home.

* * *

The first thing Otoya saw upon walking in was not very promising. He knew that his father had a good job. He knew his dad was wealthy. So to see the _small_ house that he lived in was a surprise.

"Saotome? Are you home?"

Otoya frowned. That was not the voice of a beautiful woman, a loving house wife, like it should have been. "Dad?"

"I'm home. I want you to meet someone call the boys down. This way Otoya."

He followed his father almost unwillingly. He could hear the footsteps over head as the ceiling creaked lightly. Entering the kitchen through the opened dinning room he saw it. Or rather him. The man had gray hair and deep purple eyes.

"Otoya you probably don't remember him. This is Reijingu Otori."

"Raging?"

"Close enough." The man laughed. "It's been a long time little man."

"We use to be business partners."

"I don't understand."

The older men exchanged a worried glance before the redheaded one said anything. "So your mother really didn't tell you?"

"What that you married a man? I thought Japan didn't allow that sort of thing!"

"I told you it was complicated." Saotome said. "It's more like we are recognized as partners."

"Saotome."

"Mitsuo!"

Both voices came from beyond the table. Otoya looked up to see both boys each with piercing purple eyes. The taller of the two had dark brown hair and thick rimmed glasses that slid down his nose. The other had light brown, somewhat orangish, hair and called happily to Otoya's father.

"Mitsuo!" He beamed. "Is this him?"

Saotome smiled. "Yes. Otoya this is Eiji and that back there is Eiichi. They are Otori's boys. You'll be rooming with Eiichi for the time being."

"Hey." Eiichi gave him a devious smile.

"Hello." The redhead snapped.

"Otoya we'll talk more later. Eiichi will you show him to your room?"

"Sure, sure." He turned closing his eyes. "Come."

They didn't talk until they reached the dark room. That's when Eiichi shut the door, blocking him in. "You're the one I've heard so much about. I expected more."

"Whatever." He set his bags down.

"Upset cause you have to share your dad?" The brunette teased lightly. "Mad cause now that you see our family you know you don't fit in. You expected to come back here and everything would be perfect. But it's not. You lost your dad to my family."

Otoya sniffed. "I can't lose something I never had."

"Oh my." Otori grinned. "Are you the type that pushes people away so they can't hurt you? How fun."

"I don't know what your talking about."

"Then let me show you." Purple eyes glimmered in the darkness, watching Otoya like the was the prey. He wanted to shrink away from the crazy male. But somewhere deep down he knew that this person was probably just like him. Hurt everyone before they can hurt you.

"Can you? How?"

"I can show you what it's like to be held, loved, yet still feel totally alone." The words escaped the moist lips. "Just say yes."


	11. It's so good to be by your side

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> There was a rant that followed his chapter, but screw it.

_Dec. 8_

Kaoru looked up at the big iron gates. He had been to this mansion like house before, and needless to say, he did not like it. In fact he hated it. The blonde wished he never had to come here, and stayed as far away as possible as often as he could.

Now, Kaoru lived in a big house, one far to big for just how brother and himself to live in. And his parents might be what some called rich, famous, and amazing, but this place... This place was a mini town, and there was no doubt in his mind that this family could own a good portion of the city, if not most of the state, with all the wealth they had. The Mikado household was beyond rich and glamorous.

"Come on you brat, call back." The blonde looked at his phone. After a moment he shoved his gloved hand back into his coat pocket. After four years of living in this place one might have thought that the coldness brought in by the snow wouldn't seem so bad anymore. That however was a false hope. This day hailed show at him, attacking any part of him that was not covered by his thick jacket and scarf, as he stood shivering outside the place he hated most.

Kaoru wasn't what most people would refer to as a mean person, but he did take his role as student council president very seriously. Which did lead to some people, such as his carefree vice president, thinking ill of him or just disliking him in general. That didn't upset him. What made him angry was when such people decided to ignore personal business because of his want to be the best at his 'job'.

"Answer me!" Kaoru roared. He had rung the doorbell, tried both calls and texts, and even the intercom. And he knew that the youngest Mikado was home. Where else would he have gone when there was no school and the snow was knee deep?

"Oh knock it off." The intercom finally replied to him, the voice on the other end rather annoyed. "I can hear your hissy fit over the TV. I'll be down shortly."

"Finally." The blonde yelled.

After what felt like a eternity (two minutes and twenty-seven seconds according to his watchful blue eyes) of snow pounding against him, wind lapping at his exposed skin he was finally greeted with the big wooden door opening, but not the gate.

In front of him, only separated by the iron bars, stood the bane of his existence. The seventeen year old, vice president of Hilton high, openly gay, evil genius, Nagi Mikado. He was the worst kind of person, at least Kaoru thought so. The flirtatious, flamboyant, and charming pest that pestered everyone at school.

The kind of person Kaoru feared Syo would become.

The deep gray eyes gazed upon him as if expecting something. His lips formed a small pout. Hands clutched onto the gray and black striped scarf he always wore. "Hey there Kurusu."

"Let me in." The blonde's teeth chattered.

"What's the magic word?" The teen winked.

"Now!" Kaoru yelled. He hated the way this person acted. He could clearly tell that the blonde was freezing but still insisted on playing his stupid games.

Nagi tsked. "No wonder people don't like you."

Kaoru couldn't help but to roll his eyes. He didn't want to play along but he didn't have time for most of this stupidity to continue. In the meanest, sourest, tone he could manage he called out. "Please?"

"Sure!" Nagi's eyes brightened. He pulled out what looked like a small remote and with a push of a button the gate opened and Kaoru flew in. "What do you need cutie?"

The eldest Kurusu almost gagged. "Is Syo here?"

"Let me see." Nagi hummed, tapping a finger on his hairless chin, whilst showing his guest up to his room. "A cute little blonde... who is very sad... and maybe gay. Nope not for a while. But something like that would definitely be my type."

"So you did see him."

"Like I said. Not for a while. He was here just briefly." The pink haired teen smirked. "You should keep a better eye on him. I'm not the only one who likes to play rebound."

Kaoru shivered. That was gross. "Well then I am in need of some of your more exotic skills."

"Which kind?" Nagi smiled.

The blonde rolled his eyes in disgust that the other would even think he, of all people, would hint to THAT. "I need some information on someone."

Lips curled up in pleasure. "Oh my, who would have gotten on your bad side enough for you to come to me? I'd love to be a part of this."

"Ren Jinguji."

_xxx_

If Syo had to call this occurrence something, it would probably be strange. No, something stranger than strange. Abnormal? He didn't know. After all it all started as strange.

It started with him just wanting to see a friend. Even though most times he wanted to see someone he made them come to him or he would just text them. No, this time he wanted out of the house, which was rare as it was. And who better to visit than a fellow recluse? And that let the perfect choice.

Admittedly he knew his friend Ai wasn't the most social person in the world. He figured Ai liked to be left to his own business much the way he preferred to be left alone in his room. So in Syo's mind, he thought it was a fact that Ai had not friends outside the tiny circle he talked to at school. Not that the cyan haired ten couldn't get as many as he wanted, he had a very nicer personality, but that he didn't want more people to have to talk to. He knew about a person named Kira, but very little and assumed they must not be close.

So that made him ponder why there were so many people at his house. He had known Ai for about four years and had only been over to his house twice. And there were never more than two cars in the driveway, not including Ai's motorcycle. But as he shuffled up the well walked path he noticed that they was far to much traffic there.

Syo could easily tell which car was Aine's. It was rather small and the color of the ocean on a warm summer evening. But there were three more cars all smashed into the drive, almost spilling put into the street. And then there was Cecil's bike half covered in snow, just resting on it side near the stairs. Why did Cecil even ride his bike in the winter? Syo knew Otoya had left for a while, but couldn't the young brunette as his parents for a ride?

Then for some reason, seeing all of the cars and footprints, that hand almost been covered by the heavy fall of snow, made him somewhat hesitant to ring the bell. He didn't really understand at first. As he flexed his numb hand, pulling it out of his pocket and putting it back in, he wondered when Ai had gotten so popular. Eventually he forced his cold index finger to the doorbell letting it chime before pulling his hand back, letting it get away from the abuse of the frigid weather.

He didn't want to be a bother. He just wanted to see a friend. This had nothing to do with Nagi Mikado practically forcing him out the back door. It had nothing to do with the fact he didn't want to go home and be alone n his room. Nothing at all.

Perhaps that's what made it abnormal in the first place.

He barely had enough time to let those thoughts run through his head before he was greeted by a face he had never seen before. His short, unruly, curls were light. Far shorter and lighter than Natsuki, and the frame of the body was much smaller. His dazzling eyes shimmered like pools of pure silver.

"Ai there's another one here."

"Geez." Syo could see him descending the stairs, he barely looked awake even thought it was half pasted ten on a school day. With his hair down he looked a lot more like his father. Absent-mindedly he scratched his head. With a yawn he's blurry eyes fell on Syo's shivering form. "Hey Syo."

"Hi." He scrambled for words. "Guess I should have called first."

"No big deal. All these bums just showed up because of the snow day." Ai pulled his arm, forcing him in so he could close the door.

The male next to Ai sniffed. "We skipped school, thank you."

"Shion if my dad asks you guys had a snow day too."

"Whatever you say." The person, Shion left for the living room.

"Party?" Syo raised an eyebrow.

"I guess, wish I was invited." Ai nudged the blonde. "Shion was here before I even woke up. And they've been congregating since."

"Yeah I noticed a lot of cars." Syo said almost insecurely.

"Well my uncle dropped by to visit my dad. Then there's Kira, Shion and Van they showed up in two different cars. Cecil just showed up complaining about Otoya not being home, so I thought I might as well have Tokiya come over two. I was just about to call you."

"Even Toki's here? Wow and here I thought you didn't like him." Syo gave a playful smile as he removed his shoes and jacket.

"Nah, he's pretty...okay, I guess. My dad likes him though. Since they met he comes over lime once a week and they talk about stupid stuff."

Syo laughed. "Sounds like your dad is making better friends than you."

Ai also gave a short laugh, starting to make his way to the living room with Syo on his heels. "What about you shortie?"

"Oi!" Syo gave him a shove, though Ai stood firm. "I ju wanted to get out of the house."

"Ah another spat with Kaoru. You two should really patch things up." Ai rounded the corner and stepped into the chaotic room. "If you don't you'll regret it."

"Not like you would know. You don't have an overly dramatic brother like I do."

"I wouldn't but I'm sure Cecil could tell you and Tokiya too."

"Tell who what?" Cecil's ears perked up.

That was when Syo took in the sight in front of him. There was the brunette sitting on the floor playing a card game with people Syo had never met. His blue eyes met that of Cecil's green ones and quickly looked away.

He and Cecil didn't talk much after Halloween. Cecil didn't try to explain himself and neither did Syo. But now they were in the same room, forced to talk thanks to Ai's big mouth. Although, the cyan haired boy had an all knowing smile on his face.

"Oh just about how much you miss your big brother. By the way, did Tokiya leave?"

Kira's (Syo knew based on the golden eyes that Ai had only once before mentioned that his friend had) eye's squinted at the cards in front of him, and the hand held just with in his reach. "He's upstairs, must have just missed him."

"Okay." Ai said, passing Syo to take his seat on the edge of the golden eyed male's chair as Shion and, who Syo could only assume to be, Van had taken up the whole couch.

"Ne, Ai, how come only Tokiya is allowed to go up there?" Cecil whined.

"Because it's my house." Ai answered before Kira cursed loudly.

"Finally!" Shion whooped in an overjoyed tone.

Ai laughed. "Black jack next guys."

Both Van and Kira looked at him with wide eyes. "No!"

Syo was taken aback. So this was the real Ai. He had friends, and not fake online friends like Syo had. Real friends that he could touch and laugh with. It almost made the blonde envious of him. At first he felt like they were similar, but now he felt worlds away.

He was different from Cecil who loved him.

He was different from Otoya who could just drink his cares away.

He was different from Haruka and Tomo, who actually cared for one another.

He was different from Yamato who was always smiling, happy, and overly cheerful.

And now he was different from Ai, who was among real friends that Syo had never met, and barely heard about.

Just where the hell would he find a place that he felt as if he would fit in? The only place he had ever felt like that was when he was talking to Ren. His Ren, who had probably found someone he could hold, touch, and laugh with. Where did he belong? Because it wasn't where he thought it would be.

* * *

The sun had set long ago, and Kaoru was still waiting for Syo to return. He had paced for hours after sending his little brother a text, telling himself not to panic. As he came to find out Syo was visiting his Gothic friend from school. Kaoru knew that Ai was not a bad boy so he let it slide, but he was still worried. His parents would kill him if anything happened to Syo.

Syo, their little miracle. He was their little angel. And Kaoru couldn't help bit to feel the same way. His brother had never done anything wrong. He was everything an older brother (who was practically forced to take care of his younger sibling while their parents traveled the world) could ask for.

But lately he felt that distance grow again. But Kaoru couldn't help it. He had always wanted the best for his brother. He wanted Syo to grow up, find a loving wife and have a large family that would always be there for him, unlike their parents.

He didn't want his brother to have an ex-boyfriend, that probably broke his heart, overseas. He didn't want his brother to ever be hurt.

Once he had seen the picture Nagi had pulled up of Ren Jinguji, he remembered him. That was from the time their parents had settled themselves in China. Their selfish guardians had promised it would be the last time they moved, which had been a lie, and Syo had finally begun to make friends.

Oh yes, Kaoru remembered how much he loathed Ren. In so many ways this strawberry blonde was like the Mikado teen. But now that Kaoru knew everything that Nagi had found (having an expert hacker as an acquaintance had finally played off) he knew that even Nagi was better than this foul insect.

"I'm home." Syo called.

"Welcome home." Kaoru stood making his way to the entrance. "Is there something you want to tell me?"

Syo looked at him confused. "Not that I know. Is there something I should tell you?"

"Well." Kaoru folded his arms giving his brother a stern look. "Let's start with Ren."

Syo gulped. He clenched and uncleched his hands inside his jacket pockets. "Nope, not ringing a bell."

His denial only made Kaoru mad, how could Syo keep something like that from him? "You really should log out of your email when you leave."

"What were you doing going thru my things!?"

"Trying to protect you."

"You have no right!"

"Damn it Syo! This guy is older than you. He's a guy, you need to think clearly on this. I only want what's best for you! Let's talk about this and I promise I'll help you with whatever you need."

Syo stomped his foot and yelled. "What if I don't want your help? You want me to be this perfect person, but I'm not! I never can be."

"You don't have to be perfect." Kaoru tried to calm down. Yelling would get them nowhere. "I'll I've ever done his they to help you. That's all I'll ever do. If you want to be gay fine I don't care. Just let me be there for you. I'm the only person who will always love you not matter what."

Syo blinked a tear away. "Really?"

"Really, always and forever."

_Forever, huh?_

Syo bitterly spat out before rushing off. "I hope your forever is the same as mine."


End file.
